Wowzers...What a crazy process so far...I've been Humbled!!!

I've learned a Ton...This hasn't been what I expected!!!

First..thank you to everyone for all the awesome support and encouragement...every like, every message has been VERY much appreciated!!

I'm now in the last FOUR weeks of this Challenge ...it's been an amazing learning experience and not at all what I expected.

How I have been Humbled....

Honestly I think the hardest part was coming to terms with how I actually look...that may sound weird to many but I have never actually taken a true progress picture. It's never been required so I never did it. I had no idea how to even have a progress picture taken!. 

TRUE progress pictures are just you...standing there... not flexed...that's all...Just you!! I had a really had time with what I was seeing in these pictures. I often post pictures on Instagram or even on Facebook of various parts of my body...by Abs, my Arms...the parts I like....why would I post the stuff I don't like...right?!? ...Seeing everything together was hard on me. I have VERY high expectations of myself...and the progress pictures were rather challenging!

Ab Shot for Flex Friday on IG...yes my abs look good, but remember  to look at the entire package!

PUMP!!...Again another part I like...but not showing the entire package. Nothing wrong with being proud...but keep it REAL!

Soooo seeing myself just plain, and having the entire package in one shot was kinda devastating... every Sunday!! The first set of pictures were shocking!..I had no idea actually looked how I did, Yes I had fluffed...but it was still shocking, where were my muscles :(...  I then realized I entered this contest looking this way...meaning...Sh!t...I'm in this...and this is how I look?!?. I felt like one of those bad singers on American Idol!!

I would spend most of the day Sunday nervous and feeling sick waiting for the reaction of my coaches and judges, I would analyze the pictures to DEATH...I even a crying festival in front of Alyssa one Sunday because my anxiety had just become to much to deal with!!...Poor girl!

What I've realized, is that it is VERY important to look at yourself as an entire package when you are truly wanting to make changes...AND...it's the best way to measure change because change happens soooooooo slowly!...So progress pictures, as painful as they are...really are the best way to measure changes in your physique!

I've also learned that it takes a TON of time to grow!!...Each week I would work super hard in the gym...be bang on with my macro's hoping to see huge changed next Sunday. The Worst part is that I had a vision in my head of what I would look like in 11 weeks...HAHAHAH!!...I laugh now...realizing that wasn't going to happen was yet another hard  and devastating blow to my emotional self!! It scared the crap out of me to not know what I was going to look like at the end...and that EVERYONE was going to see what I looked like in my before shots and in what could be my not so impressive after shots!...very hard pill to swallow!

I had no idea how small I really am!.. I thought I had more size (muscle) than I actually do. What I have is the ability to stay lean, and that makes me look muscular. If you put me on stage beside other athletes I would fade away into the stage! My 11 week goals have now become 11 month goals...and that is more realistic! Craig always tells me this "Don't waiver on your goals little lady...just change the time frame" I never really got that until now. It's not that I can't have amazing legs..(my dream)...I just will not have them in 11 weeks...11 months perhaps...but NOT in 11 weeks ;)

The last Humbler in this was the HIIT cardio....Pushing the prowler sled for 20 seconds FULL out...rest for 20 seconds and go again, for 15 minutes. Most people know that I have done loads of running...loads and loads. So when Alyssa asked me to add in HITT...pushing the prowler sled, I thought...OK...I'm not sure what to expect, but I'll give this a go. Thank the good Lord I only have to do HITT 2x's a week...it is honestly the HARDEST thing I have Every done!. Craig calls the After..."The Prowler Flu"...that is totally what it is... You feel like you just got the worst flu EVER!!..The way your body feels in not even describable...you need to do it to understand how hard it is!!. It has made major improvements in my lower half...so as I push the sled, I say in my head..." I don't want a jiggly butt...I don't want a jiggly butt"...ha ha!...True story!!

Love...Hate...HITT Cardio...Prowler Flu!!

So in saying all of that....What I can say is that I am VERY proud of how far I managed to come in the time I've had. I've made some solid changes in my upper half...we are looking to create a better V shape and I see that coming...my legs have leaned out a TON...they have never ever been this lean and I still weigh 117lbs! I'm also hitting all kinds of  max lifts at the Gym. What used to be my MAX single squat 135lbs...is now the weight I use for 5 sets of 5 :)....Realizing that is what made me cry at the gym a few weeks back!..It was a long time goal of mine to squat well with a 45lb plate on each side!..Yay ME! :)

My Better "V" Shape is coming!

I'm MOST MOST MOST proud of how I've dealt with the Diet. On many occasions I was very tempted to just not eat. When I wasn't seeing changes it was hard for me to no just go back to what I did before. I would think to myself...if I just stop eating, I'll be skinny...and that is better than this!. I made a promise to myself and to my coaches to follow though...to trust the process...to better myself with this contest. If I let myself fall back into old ways, I would have failed completely. I see how this process works...I'm no longer afraid to eat...I welcome the food as fuel...and I am MOST proud of that change.!!

I'm proud I stayed committed!! 

Thanks for taking the time to read this Blog...my main points and things I've learned are:

1. Don't fool yourself with fake progress pictures and filters...AND Don't BE fooled by IG and filters!!

2. Look at the Entire Package if you want to change the Entire Package

3.It takes a TON of time and eating to grow

4.Trust in the process and work HARD

I'm beyond thankful to Alyssa and Craig. Everyone knows the "Body by Bongelli" The Big Man got me started, I'll be forever thankful!!...I'm super excited to present the "HOLY CRAP by Coppolino" in 4 short weeks :). The diet has really been the game changer in this for me...Alyssa has been an amazing coach!!...Craig has always trained me well, but now that this little lady has fuel, I kill his programs! ;)

When you see her Train... see her Grow...you WANT to work with her!!...100% Dedication to Training herself and her Clients! 

I'm 36 and Being BULLIED....Yep...Bullied!!.....By Grown Women...Pathetic!!

So I thought I would share a little something with those that enjoy my bogs and posts....Bullies...They never change!!

I wanted to share with those that read and enjoy my blogs that I've got some Bullies...I have been attacked on several occasions by some grown up MEAN GIRLS!! I honestly can't believe that these MOTHERS would treat another person the way I have been treated.

This Picture was sent to a person I know...she said she does not know the sender, and the phone # in the picture is not from the sender. This text has been placed in another text to look like it came from this random # and then sent off. 

Yep A Grown Woman sent this around!...a Grown woman with Kids!

So the above picture was taken OFF my Facebook by a "friend" They choose to add that caption...and send it around. I've taken this to the police and we know it was sent by a Woman...One she attacked me as a mother...and Two she attacked my sexuality. All it takes is a suspects phone # and the receivers # to confirm who did this...but I'm choosing to be the bigger person and not press charges...nor tell who it is. I just hope they read this blog and understand how pathetic they are!

YES I fully understand that when you post on ANY social media site you are open to critics...I'm not oblivious to that fact!!. But what is pathetic is that I'm being bullied by grown women...that in my opinion are jealous. They are upset that I have managed to keep my weight off...I have struggled...I've been honest...and I'm trying to get better, Yet I STILL get attacked by Grown women with children!!

The point of my post is to tell you that no matter what you are doing in life people will find inspiration...OR...they will find a reason to Hate on you!!!..So just keep Swimming!!

These games played by immature girls does nothing but push me harder!...So thank you for being bitches!! I have an amazing support system behind me...helping me get Healthy. 

I'm not looking for oh I'm sorry you are dealing with this Sheryl...or any thing like that. I want anyone that reads this to know that I fight HARD...I fight every day to be healthy...and I'm not letting anyone stop me! I've had a TON of people tell me they have dealt with the same issues I am dealing with, and knowing I am helping at least ONE person...make all this other stuff laughable!

So to the Mean Girls...I know who you are...and I think you are Pathetic, I've helped you in the past with weight issues and been nothing but supportive of you!...You are Mothers!. Imagine if your child was being treated like you are treating me?...how would you react?.. Likely not as well as I am reacting!! NO one is forced to read my blogs...like my posts...this contest...or my photos. So if you are not interested...that is A-OK...but Please look at what you are doing, how you are behaving and make yourself better!!

 I will continue to blog,post pictures and kick ASS...This journey is for ME...for my Health.